A man and his wife are talking.

You:
"Yesterday I had a wonderful
Dream. I was in Aldi and a fairy appeared
and said to me, I should for 200 €
buy what I want, it would all
paid for. I am with a full 2 Shopping Cart
beaming from the Aldi-out gorgeous. "

He:
"Yesterday I had a nice
Dream. I had great sex with two very
beautiful women. That was really cool. "

You:
"I was also there"?

He:
"No, you were in Aldi" ... ..

A couple having sex - she starts to groan: "Yeah, I gibs! Tell me nasty things! "

He: "kitchen, bathroom, living room ..."

The woman in front of Huber's Ibiza diving ertrunken.Zwei years later, the coast guard's body and Huber sends a telegram:

"Your wife's body found covered with shells. Pearls valued at 500,000 euros. "

Huber telegraphed back:

'Send sell beads, money, lay bait again!

A man sits in a crowded airplane. Only the seat next to him is still coming down the aisle frei.Da a beautiful woman and sits beside him.

The man can hardly stand it.

"Sorry," he says, "why you fly to Berlin?"

You: "I fly to sex Congress, I will give a talk there and clean up some of the stereotypes. Many people believe, for example, the blacks were particularly splendid

equipped, while there are Native Americans, the Indians, for whom this is so. And many believe the French are the best lovers. Here, the Turks are preparing their wives the most fun at sex ...

But I do not know why I'm telling you all know ... I do not even know your name. "

The man stretches out his hand.

"Winnetou," he says ... "Winnetou Öztürk"

A couple is eating at an Italian restaurant delicious. She goes to a whole load of tomato sauce on the white blouse, and comments ". Man, I look like a pig," He replied, "vollgekleckert And did you also."

The three biggest crises in the life of one man job away - scratches in the paint - all charcoal

There comes a young man in a flower shop. He looks around but can not find anything. A while later, the clerk asks if she could help. Yes, he did not know exactly what he should take. He had met a nice girl and wants her to bring a beautiful bouquet, he just did not know what. The seller says: "Make it as before but: Do you want to flatter, give violet. Caress you like, give roses. "

The young man thinks for a moment and replies: "Yes ... I would like a bouquet of sweet peas."

A man and a woman lie in bed at night. Asks the man his neighbor's bed, if they still want to have a "small Nümmerchen". The woman is a clearly understandable refusal on the grounds that she had an appointment with the gynecologist tomorrow morning and they would have no time to absolutely showers early in the morning yet! The man sees and thinks. It goes for a while and the man is active again with the question: "My treasure, but a dentist appointment in the morning is not it?"

You: "Must you really so late every night from the pub to come home?" He: "No - I do voluntarily."

Last night, my wife and I discussed at the table on one or the other and then we came to talk about euthanasia. On this sensitive

Theme about the choice between life and death, I said to her: `If s

times should come to this - Do not leave me in such a state! I do not want

Only live-by machine-dependent and nourished by fluids from a bottle. If

I'm in this state, then please turn off the machine that made ​​me alive

get. "

As she got up, the TV and the computer has found out and my beer poured away.

The Stupid cow

The physician at the deathbed: "Your wife . I do not like "" Me neither, but it will not last long anymore, or "?

If a man with his Porsche into a
Friend says, hey where did you get the
Porsche ago!
So this was so, I stand today as
Tramper
on the road, holding sweet mouse with ne
Mini skirt and says Willste ride!
Sure, I clean in the car, she goes on
out the parking gets out, pulls
their string, and says: so now can
You take what you like!!
I, of course, the Porsche and from!
Says his mate, but since you had right
Who knows if the string would fit you!